President James E. Faust cautioned single members, “Being single does not mean you have to put off being happy.”2. In my late twenties, I began a major identity check. Because Elder Oaks felt that in our dating we should not attend public events together, we began from that day to visit family members, eat with them, take walks, go on picnics, and have ice cream on backyard patios. I was the Gospel Doctrine teacher in a home ward I dearly loved, surrounded by great friends and leaders. My only social life occurred in this narrow weekend window of time. Looking back on my single years, I am so very thankful for the time I had to learn the gospel, to live the gospel, and to make Heavenly Father my best friend. Just before Dallin was eight years old, his father died of Tuberculosis, leaving behind his wife … At a stake conference in Cali, Colombia, a sister told how she and her fiancé desired to be married in the temple, but at that time the closest temple was in faraway Peru. He was born on August 12, 1932 (87 years old) in Provo, Utah. The reality hit me that I had no real skills to support myself. She is a tenacious visionary and has great determination to get things done. I loved my Church callings. Dallin H. Oaks, first counselor in the LDS Church’s governing First Presidency, used the query during last month’s General Conference to set up a speech about trusting in God. We laughed and talked, and our courtship began. The transition is frequently difficult. Life was good. There were also many hours alone. Elder Oaks' previous wife, June, died July 21, 1998. These activities provided an in-depth opportunity to really learn about each other. I belong to The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints in the final days before the Savior returns to this earth to rule and reign. The expectations for fellowship are high because we live in a world where social isolation is increasing. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints is hosting a Face to Face event on Sunday, February 23, 2020, at 4:00 p.m. mountain standard time. I personally remember how difficult it was for me as a single to sit alone in church every Sunday. To complicate matters, at the end of June a competing corporation called to offer me my dream job, which would mean living in New York. So much was taking place around me, and yet I was struggling just to get started-I was a single sister in the Lord’s army, and I was still seeking to find my place. In my case, I was given help in the form of a dear friend, Donna Lee Bowen. Summary: Kristen McMain is 73 years old and was born on 10/15/1947. More than that, I loved every minute of learning and discovered not only new ideas but also my own capabilities. That trust helped me avoid much pain and anguish. I did not tell him I had just had a permanent and needed to cover my head. But I never gave up the desire to marry or the hope that it would happen. Whether you are happy or not depends to some degree upon outward circumstances, but mostly it depends on how you choose to look at things yourself, whether you measure what you have or what you have not. I came to know revelation is real. Click here to buy a copy of the book A Single Voice: The Unexpected Life is No Less a Life by Kristen M. Oaks. I have a vested interest in single adults because I spent so much of my life as a single woman. After I gave notice of my resignation, the company increased my workload and responsibilities. on the blessing given me. The Lord had blessed me with a full and happy single life. This is and must be a very real thing.” He added, “We must never permit this spirit of brotherhood and sisterhood to weaken. It was a difficult time in my life because I wore “golden handcuffs.” Whenever I wished to quit my job, it became more lucrative. It was like practicing in a flight simulator. I did buy a car. Editor’s Note: The following is an excerpt from A Single Voice: The Unexpected Life is No Less a Life by Kristen M. Oaks, wife of Elder Dallin H. Oaks. We developed a wonderful friendship, and I came to love his family. It is easy to feel accepted when our lives are so much like those around us. I wanted to be happy. Dallin H Oaks again, following up on what Kristen just said: “I think that as young women have been encouraged – properly, in my view, to get an education and make plans to support themselves, that many young men have seen the accomplishments of the women in such a way as to be frightened of them. Sister Kristen Oaks, wife of Elder Dallin H. Oaks, talks about the people of Sendai, Japan, where she served her mission. This was not the life I had expected, and I had no plan of action to accommodate it. My parents were still living, and my sisters were my best friends. Elder Oaks told me that he had often taken walks with his wife, June, who had died two years earlier. I have learned from happy and sad experience that if we wish for our ward experience to be a positive one, we have to make it so. President Joseph F. Smith on Finding Peace in Perilous Times, Has Orson Hyde’s Prayer Been Fulfilled? Heavenly Father provided so many opportunities for me. In my early twenties my life was not progressing confidently in the direction I had envisioned for myself. As was stated in October 2004 general conference, “It is not enough to know that God lives, that Jesus Christ is our Savior, and that the gospel is true. “If you believe all these things see that ye do them” (Mosiah 4:10). I know that all we do in life contributes to our future happiness. I would not give up my calling. As Robert D. Putman, a Harvard political scientist, stated in his book, “America is fraying as people spend more time alone and we are becoming a nation of loners.”. In fact, I often left late Sunday evening and returned home Friday night. Elder Oaks’s immediate phone call to me created a few daunting circumstances: he wanted to bring his daughter Sharmon to meet me before she left town the next day. The very diversity that makes a residential ward so vital and strengthening to some makes others feel they have just entered a Church where there is no place for them. I believed the bishop’s words, but I had to believe them enough to act on them. Elder Dallin H. Oaks of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles shared a video today of some of his family members performing at the Missionary Training Center in Provo, Utah, over Thanksgiving. We did school projects together. Many can relate to this who have had their plan for life shattered by a divorce, by a death, by a disappointment, or by a major betrayal. I attended the temple to serve and to receive revelation. We are a Church that needs faithful workers. Now that I am married, I do not feel that I have graduated to a higher plane. I gave notice and planned to leave on July 1, 2000. In fact, it seemed not to be progressing at all. The Church community provided me with experiences that would bless me for my future family life. There could be no better and more eventful time in which to live. Anyone who has left longtime employment and security to serve the Lord can, Considering resigning from a career into which I had invested nearly twenty years was no small thing for me. I never doubted the Lord and my patriarchal blessing that I would have my husband and family but maybe not while I lived on this earth and on my timetable. The Lord blessed me with a wonderful family, and I stayed close to them and had the privilege of nurturing them. Now, much to my delight, they are my family as well. Concerned and feeling unable to change my life, I asked my bishop for a blessing. He was called as a member of the church's Quorum of the Twelve Apostles in 1984. Dallin H. Oaks. He was raised in Provo, Utah. Singles often feel more comfortable in the company of other singles. Entering this new environment can be lonely and intimidating. I needed the Spirit more than I needed sleep. We must fulfill our responsibilities” Our righteous acts cement our testimonies, bring the Spirit into our lives, and make any ward we attend the one where we can become the person our Heavenly Father wishes us to become. Everyone is different; we all have differing needs and desires. 443K likes. I also knew that teaching the Sunday School class, especially preparing for it, was blessing my life and feeding my spirit. She writes of Hester, who is fast approaching age thirty, and the advice given her: “‘Do I detect a note of self-pity, Hester? Single members hold high expectations that their wards will be places of refuge, of personal growth and of spiritual renewal. What the singles ward does provide is an environment to associate with others of similar interests and age, where being single is the norm. There is often a period of adjustment, and it takes time and effort to develop new relationships and discover ways to make meaningful contributions. He is American by natinoanliy. My studies in English literature had fed my soul, but now I needed to feed my pocketbook. That mission laid the groundwork for my life. — Dallin H Oaks, April 2019. As a consultant who traveled constantly, I earned a generous salary. I was afraid to develop myself too much because somehow I mistakenly believed that I might make myself unattractive to a prospective husband. In her novel The Face of a Stranger, Anne Perry, herself a single, faithful Latter-day Saint woman, writes words that had significance to me. I do know that I feel more complete. I never had the goal to marry an Apostle. Sister Kristen M. Oaks, wife of President Dallin H. Oaks of the First Presidency, married him when she was 53 years old and he was a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles. SALT LAKE CITY, UTAH -- The LDS Church's Public Affairs Office confirmed today that Elder Dallin H. Oaks of the Church's Quorum of the Twelve Apostles is getting married for the second time next week. At times I felt quite content and occupied; at other times I felt actual physical pain. Dallin Harris Oaks (* 12. Only later was I to learn why this calling was so pivotal to me, because through it one class member would eternally bless my association with my future husband (see chapter 5). I have never traveled farther nor worked longer hours. Credit: Courtesy Kristen Oaks, Courtesy Kristen Oaks. There may be wards, branches or classes, but we are all part of the same Church. Dallin H. Oaks is an Apostle of the LDs Church. It was not until six months later that I learned that my future husband, at the prodding of his eldest daughter, Sharmon, was to commence his search for a wife in that very month. I believe that is Heavenly Father’s plan. For some, a move to a family ward can seem like a separation from a surrogate family and close friends. But on October 13, 2005, Anna wakes up to the news that her mother had passed away. Looking back, I realize it was pivotal that I trusted in and acted. It was a time to help me cement my faith. My exposure to General Authorities had been minimal, and I liked it that way. Dallin H. Oaks was born in Provo, Utah on August 12, 1932. We recently talked with Sister Kristen M. Oaks, beloved wife of Elder Dallin H. Oaks. About. Over years of time and with repeated efforts, I learned to listen to the promptings of the still, small voice, and those promptings blessed my life. She told me to get on with my life and make something of it. But I was waiting for my life to happen. Dallin H. Oaks (born 1932), Member of the First Presidency of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints Dallin Leavitt (born 1994), American football player Dallin … Copyright © 2021 Deseret News Publishing Company. We decided on a walk in Liberty Park. We must constantly cultivate it. Click Here To 'Like' Meridian Magazine on Facebook, Pittsburgh Pennsylvania Temple Location Announced, Temple in Tooele Relocated and Renamed, Meridian Readers are Talking about the New Nauvoo Diary, Why Elizabeth Smart’s grandmother’s passing inspired her to compete on ‘The Masked Dancer’, 10 Tips To Keep Your Kids Safe on Social Media, Come, Follow Me For Individuals and Families: “What Lack I Yet?” Matthew 19-20; Mark 10; Luke 18, Photo Essay: Come with Young Joseph into the Sacred Grove, Five Secrets the Book of Mormon Reveals about the Rise and Fall of Nations. Sharmon shared much about their family and her mother. Since 1984 he has been a member of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. Dallin Harris Oaks (born August 12, 1932) is an American jurist, educator, and religious leader who since 2018 has been the First Counselor in the First Presidency of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints (LDS Church). I was protected by these small acts. Slowly, ever so slowly, spiritual things unfolded in my life and came to serve as the foundation of my life. Each weekend when I returned from assignments, I drove directly from the airport to pick up my nieces and nephews, and they stayed with me. It is a time of great adventure, a time to be valiant, a time to rejoice, a time to testify, a time to join in the battle for goodness and right. We prayed together, visited Temple Square, and had walks and talks. I would do anything to be able to make better dinner rolls. By age fifty-two I lived alone, had my own condominium, had a terrific job working for a prestigious publishing house, and had just purchased a new SUV. My dreams of having a husband and family were not coming true and looked as if they would never come true. It was heart-wrenching because I had not prepared for it or even anticipated it. All those years of cooking for Young Women parties, planning Primary activities, and making Christmas wreaths at Relief Society Enrichment meetings began paying unexpected dividends. All rights reserved. I moved from the classroom to consulting. I learned how to calm screaming babies, to instruct children, to interact with priesthood holders, to support the priesthood, to conduct meetings, to counsel, to cooperate, and to be part of a group-skills that are integral to family life. Most of my life, energy, and time were going to my employment. If I had not had more than thirty adult years of trying to obey my priesthood leaders, to trust in their advice, and to believe that the counsel they offered was inspired, I would not have had enough personal strength to resign from my job. He was blessing me with adequate time and experience to build a solid and sure testimony. On occasion my experience was similar to sitting around waiting to receive my uniform before I could enter the war. I look back on small pivotal choices (though as I experienced them, they did not seem pivotal) that were to have great effect on my future marriage. I only advise you to be obedient to the promptings you feel for yourself. I had to stop traveling and find employment at home. My name is Kristen Meredith McMain Oaks. I rejoiced during my single years, and I suffered through them too, while I was discovering what Heavenly Father wanted for me. The Jewish Gathering to Palestine, Latest temple updates: 4 Pacific Area temples moving soon to Phase 3; 2 Chile temples paused, VIDEO: Accomplishing Your Righteous Goals One Small Step at a Time, When as a Mission President, I Couldn’t Feel the Spirit. I felt my time with them was more than just a travel opportunity or time to play. And they don’t have two doors at the temple — one for couples and one for singles. By Deseret News Jul 22, 1998, 12:00am MDT June Dixon Oaks, 65, wife of Elder Dallin H. Oaks of the Quorum of the Twelve, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, died in her Salt Lake home Tuesday, July 21, after battling cancer for more than a year. We visited Nauvoo, Illinois; Gettysburg, Pennsylvania; and Park City, Utah. With all the faith her 9-year-old self can muster, she prays for her mother to be healed. The more I devoted myself to the gospel, the richer my life became. I attended graduate school to learn a skill so I could support myself, and then I just kept going to school because no one stopped me by marrying me. My demanding workload and dismal dating life were taking a toll, even though I had always had a strong conviction that everything would turn out well in the end. There is no separate Church for singles. My employment as a national and international educational consultant who trained teachers to teach reading was purposeful and rewarding. It is not enough to know (we are led by) God’s prophet. President Oaks was born in Provo, Utah, on August 12, 1932. Because I value and believe in the plan of salvation, I wanted all the blessings associated with it. My wish for other singles is that they enjoy each and every day of their life. I read the scriptures and came to understand His doctrine. Although, as Elder Holland suggests, we are living in the “greatest of all dispensations,” as a single woman I remember feeling many times that I was just marking time, waiting for my life to happen. . We also had sleepovers and went to plays, museums, carnivals, car washes, libraries, and bookstores. After a crushing breakup with a longtime high school boyfriend, I realized the identity I expected for myself as a stay-at-home mother was not going to be: no children and no one to support me financially, emotionally, or physically. Dallin H. Oaks was sustained and set apart as first counselor in the First Presidency and president of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of The Church of Jesus Christ of … He blessed me. I prayed and He answered. His first job was to sweep at a radio repair shop. Travel and work plus Church responsibilities began to seem almost overwhelming. I’ve been blessed because I had priesthood leaders who knew this.”. 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