5. Hack Spirit is one of the leading authorities providing practical and accessible relationship advice. By Ellen Nyland Written on Nov 16, 2021. Is he actually trying to be funny or does it genuinely seem like hes being mean? And the last thing they want is to be rejected (its terrible for their ego). The more he sees that youre supporting all areas of his life, the less hell fear losing his independence. So he puts up a front. / "What would my parents think?" Im confused; does he like me or not? He said it was that he can't support a relationship right now, he can't be enough for me, that I smothered him, and that he wants to be single and independent. Guys generally process their feelings slower than females. An emotionally unavailable guy will close themselves off once you show any type of interest, so be careful if he suddenly freezes up all of a sudden. If you want specific advice on your situation, it can be very helpful to speak to a relationship coach. The average guy thinks that the definition of "after play" is the duration of time between his orgasm and the time it takes to reach for his phone. Even if you are a girl, dont panic! Are they that afraid of rejection that they'd rather hide their true feelings no matter what? He's clearly jealous and wants to track and control you. 10 Cleaning Rules for Roommates To Create A Spotless Home! Hes afraid that he might do something wrong or hurt you. 1. 24+ Clean Comebacks for Bullies Thatll Make You Smile, Is My Boss a Narcissist Quiz (10 Questions to Help You Find Out!). Be relaxed and chat to him like he is your buddy. While this article explores the most common reasons why guys act distant when they like you, it can be helpful to speak to a relationship coach about your situation. He might be afraid of commitment because he is afraid of being hurt. Accept the change. Maybe he's putting you on a pedestal that you weren't aware of and feels like he doesn't deserve you and that he'd be incredibly lucky if you didn't reject him, but he doesn't want to take his chances (because of reason number 3). Hes trying to sell himself so that youll give him the time of day and your phone number. Everybody has habits that even you're not aware of. One of the obvious reasons why a guy may ignore or act disinterested in you is because he feels you are too good for him. According to Jones, someone's reason for ghosting you likely has little do with you at all. Creepy. If you buy through links on this page, we may earn a small commission. Something changed. Notice how he treats you in the presence of other people, especially women. Smile at him, give him eye contact. Your man is acting distant. If a guy feels this way about you, it means that he might feel vulnerable in a relationship or in being open with people. 1) He's not actually ignoring you The first explanation that we need to eliminate from the list before going any further is checking that he really is ignoring you in the first place? One of the main reasons a guy acts rude when he likes you is because he's jealous of other men. This is probably the biggest reason men act distant to a woman they like. Dont panic though. This will make him feel safe and secure. Last Updated January 29, 2023, 7:33 am. You might be thinking that a guy wants to date you, but maybe he really doesnt. Often it may be because being rude is their coping mechanism for dealing with their emotions. He might be thinking that if he can get you to react and engage with him, even if its in a negative way, then at least youre noticing him. by Other potential reasons include him feeling overwhelmed or that he's not sure if he's ready for a . Maybe there's something about you that goes against some kind of belief system he has. If you give space and time to figure out things out, then eventually hell more than likely come around. ), If a man wants you, hell pursue you: The truth. If he doesn't know how to deal with these emotions and express his feelings in a positive way, he may use rudeness as a defense mechanism. In fact, the strongest relationships tend to take time to grow into a rock-solid bond. 1. Because youre sending him the opposite signals of what he needs to commit to you. First, remove yourself from the situation as much as possible. He gets very serious or quiet. When a guy acts rudely in an effort to control the situation, thats when his behavior becomes obvious. If you can be open, then he might get closer to you and start to share his feelings. Hack Spirit. Often, this is seen as "I don't give a s***," "I'm glad that I got rid of her," and "Let's move on to the next lady. But oftentimes men brag in an attempt tobuildvalue. Here are 11 Reasons! Maybe he's having problems at work and doesn't feel like talking about them. 65 One of the obvious reasons why a guy may ignore or act disinterested in you is because he feels you are too good for him. Relationships are big commitments, and while he might be sure that he really likes you, he might feel better about it if it moves a bit slower. Question: What does it mean when he won't touch you? Sometimes people might act rude because they get jealous of the time and attention you give to others. Meanwhile, men haven't caught on to these changes yet. Remember youre giving him space to allow him to work through his feelings. Some women act like total bitches towards guys they like." Good point. Another way this might manifest is through hyper-masculinity meaning he might act like an oddly macho, macho man. That can be enough to make him keep his hands to himself just a little while longer. But heres the ironic truth. If the guy is feigning disinterest to that degree and for those reasons, don't date him. A cocky attitude may in itself tell a woman a guy has the goods, and lying can cover the rest. Just because he is acting distant doesnt mean he doesnt want a relationship with you. Instead, he would rather save himself the trouble and remain noncommittal. Dont get down about it. He may seem quiet and pensive and take your conversations with the gravity of a Master's dissertation. Check it out. But, more often, the signs a guy likes you are vague and confusing. 3. He likes that you are interested in him so much that you would put up with this behavior, and he wants to make sure you know how good he is. She's author of the book "Life is Great Even When it Sucks. One of the main reasons a guy acts rude when he likes you is because hes jealous of other men. He might show signs that he doesnt need the girl by being rude or not getting what he wants. It scares him what others will think of him when they see him with you. It is hard not to judge yourself based on how others see you and the way they treat you. Some men arent used to showing their emotions, and the way they deal with this is by acting rude. No, he doesnt want to fly into a room with his cape on to fight the baddies. So thats exactly why he might be feeling scared. Rather than put himself out there and risk the chance of getting hurt, he would rather hurt you instead by sabotaging the situation. As someone whos been on both ends of the spectrum, I can see why sometimes guys act rude when they like a girl because they are scared of being rejected or just want the girl to notice them. Can you come across as a bit of an ice queen? Last Updated March 3, 2023, 2:11 am, by They lash out with everything they got, and language is the first thing they use, combined with the body language they know that will piss the partner off. They are usually very insecure and are afraid of the rejection that can come with letting someone know you like them. So let's dive deep into why your man might be acting distant. Maybe it just seems to him that you want something that he can't provide. He doesn't aknowledge you when you ask him about his bad behavior. Have you already voiced expectations you have for him, even without realizing it? Its not an excuse for bad behavior, but it could be that hes lashing out because hes feeling lost or hurt. That means when you step on a guys' masculinity things are bound to get wonky pretty quickly most times. Why do guys act cold when they like you? He will feel that doing so would be asking too much as it would force him to grow up and start taking life more seriously. Ive been there. It doesnt mean he actually dislikes you; quite the opposite, hes just posturing for his friends. 1. Or theyd go out on a Saturday night and try to pick up girls. Maybe he's faking disinterest because he doesn't want you to know that he likes you. He lacks the confidence to approach you or share his feelings with you, fearing you might reject him. Thats why sometimes guys act rude and distant because they are trying to figure out if its real or not. Why? He might act rude because he is not sure what he wants. He doesn't apologize for his bad behavior. Likewise, make sure you focus on your own individual passions in life. (Explained!). The best thing you can do is just be nice and remain open for the relationship. One act of rudeness can easily spiral and cause other acts of rudeness, spreading foul tempers and poor behavior in its wake. The term was first coined by relationship expert James Bauer, who discovered what he believes to be the key to a happy relationship: triggering the hero instinct in men. Answer: Probably that he doesn't want to touch you. In fact, youre sure that he actually genuinely likes you. Guys like that aren't really worth talking about, because they're pretty rare. Just give him space first. Maybe he's been rude the entire time but you didn't perceive it that way. 64 He talks about me a lot and gets embarrassed when people say they ship us. Tall, dark,andboastful? The whole meet the parents scenario is a big deal. Instead, he gets the jump on you by pushing you away, and then he doesn't have to deal with his lack of maturity. What if he has a teeny tiny ego that does not easily recover from such things? Acting distant is a form of defense mechanism designed to protect himself. Imagine if you were experiencing strong emotions that were totally foreign to you and you didnt know how to process them. At that time, there was no talking about feelings. He thinks that if the girl notices him, then she cant notice anyone else. If a guy feels insecure in himself, he might not know how to express it properly. Answer: He said he doesn't like you. Well, show him that wont happen when hes dating you. Some guys know they are awesome and attractive, and they might show it by acting rude. Men are not always obvious when their attraction for you is driving them crazy. This could lead him in two directions. Although this could be that he's nervous, there's also a good chance that he has a huge crush on you. After all, love becomes your priority. Pearl Nash It doesnt matter how much you love someone. There are times when the simplest answer is the correct one, and it's entirely possible that he is just not ready to be in any type of relationship. The business you wanted to start? He feels that sharing his true feelings might ruin your friendship with him. If youre interested in a guy and he seems to be acting rude on purpose, it could be that hes whats known as a commitment-phobe. It sounds immature, but unfortunately, some guys feel the need to act tough in front of their mates. There are many different ways to show him that you like him, from smiling and winking at him to asking him out on a date. Did something happen that threw him off kilter?". He started this blog to help others find and define their own self development journey. Women were taught to look after the home, the sick, and the children. I was blown away by how kind, empathetic, and genuinely helpful my coach was. When a guy is interested in a girl he likes, he becomes overly protective over her because he doesnt want any other man to flirt or get close to her. He wants you to chase them, and so he acts rude to get your attention. I know that these tips can seem complicated, and sometimes they take some time to work. Some men dont like to get close or have a serious relationship, and he deals with it by acting rude. He could be scared sheetless of you. More:How To Talk Dirty To Him So Hell Do ANYTHING You Want. Examining what a guy does and trying to figure out if that means he likes you is not as useful if you fail to take into consideration what kind of guy they are. And you might think that its up to him to woo you anyway, so it shouldnt matter how you behave. Ideally, this would be a professional coach or counselor with experience dealing with . It will make your life more interesting as well. I believe in love, so Im gonna put my money where my mouth is And since Im confident about your willpower and strength of character, Im also willing to share this with you in this article. You Haven't Triggered Her Feelings of Sexual Attraction Yet. He is probably not ready for a serious relationship While it is all roses and violins playing in the background for some people, for others, love can be extremely scary, especially for men. If a guy acts rude, it might be that he is not ready for a relationship with anyone else. Phil lives in England, UK, and has around 20 years experience as a professional life, career and executive coach. There is always a reason for a guys actions, Im sure youll get to the bottom of it and everything will work out the way its meant to be! When the line starts to build, the service slows down. So if you think he might be acting distant because things are going so fast, take a moment to let him know that youre okay with going slower. Maybe hes ambitious and his boss is asking him to work late and put in extra hours. If you can help him talk about his fears, then he might finally be able to share his feelings with you and show some emotions. They walk around as if they own the world, and hide their insecurities behind a mask of "I know it all.". You might be thinking about why he acts as he does and gives you the cold shoulder. So lets dive deep into why your man might be acting distant. Men do still need to be a hero. Ltd. We sometimes include products we think are useful for our readers. These guys know they arent the most attractive or popular guys in the world, and their insecurities get the best of them when you give them attention. These types of people are bad news, and having control issues is a sign of a deep character flaw. You can do this by being aware of his insecurities, and by changing the way you behave towards him. Hes not trying to compete with you or one up you, at least not usually. However, this is completely wrong. One of the signs a guy likes you is his level of seriousness. Perhaps they find the courting stage thrilling but see the stable relationship phase as boring. He doesnt want their feelings to change suddenly or become more serious than he already is. If he is insecure, he will try to pull a bait and switch on you so he can feel better about himself and have the upper hand. If a guy is going through a tough time in his life, he might start to act out and take it out on the people around him including you. Why do some guys do this? Another signa man likes you involves his approach. He puts you down. He is scared of his feelings This is probably the biggest reason men act distant to a woman they like. Another reason women act like they don't like you is because they are not feeling sexually attracted to you yet. There are many reasons why guys act distant. Register forhisfree webinarthat reveals the 3 Keys to Attracting and Keeping a High-Quality Man or grab his free guide 8 Secrets To Create A Rock Solid Relationship, byclicking this link. There is hope! Is he mad or disappointed? Two men may do the same thing, but it may mean something completely different in each case due to their differing motivations. / "What would my wife think?". If he can trust you and feels comfortable around you, then he might open to you in ways you cant imagine. Why? Below are some reasons why this withdrawal happens: 1. He delivers private virtual coaching sessions and leads online group workshops. Click here to get $50 off your first session (exclusive offer for Hack Spirit readers). Maybe he has become more vulnerable around you and all of these feelings are bubbling up that he isnt comfortable with. Do not accept the rude. more: Why Do Men Withdraw When They're Falling In Love? He might also feel awkward in a relationship because he isnt used to being close to someone else for so long and gets nervous about being vulnerable with someone else. According to the study "The Presence of an Attractive Woman Elevates Testosterone and Physical Risk Taking in Young Men" published in "Social Psychological and Personality Science" in 2010, found that young adult men took bigger risks when performing skateboarding tricks in front of attractive women. In other words, women look after the "soft" side of life, and men are expected to embrace the "hard" side of life: war and death. All rights reserved. After he has recharged his man batteries, hell likely come around again and stop acting so damn distant. In their minds, it's easier to . So take your time. If a guy doesn't feel the same way after knowing you like him, there's a chance he will act indifferent or oblivious about the information. This will save you grief, frustration, and miscommunication that can lead to a breakup, and in turn, it will give you a relationship that built on understanding, compassion, and equality. One of the obvious reasons why a guy may ignore or act disinterested in you is because he feels you are too good for him. Communication is a two-way street. We welcome your feedback at [emailprotected]. We spoke about the fact that men fear losing their independence. If a guy feels that you are not that into him, he has probably never felt this way about anyone before. Hell eventually want to meet your family. Its the oldest tale in romance boy likes girl, boy teases girl on the playground, or shoots spitballs at her hair, or [insert aggravating behavior here], and then somehow, boy and girl live happily ever after. When a guy acts rude, it means that he doesnt trust in you or himself. That's right ladies: all that strange and/or macho behavior you deal with is simply so his friends won't view him as whipped. Eventually, when you score some time with them, you get nervous and flustered - unsure how to act or even speak. Theyre a very popular resource for people facing this sort of challenge. 1. As a woman, I get that, but if you want a successful relationship, you better start figuring out the coping method your guy uses.